How to manage behavioral problems in adolescents? 6 tips
Some recommendations and tips on parenting and education to be applied with adolescents.
Adolescence is a stage of life marked by rebelliousness or, at least, by the evident distancing between the young people who go through it, on the one hand, and the adults who take care of them or supervise them, on the other. This makes the appearance of conflicts, frictions between two very different value systems, priorities that have nothing to do with each other and, in general, habits that are complicated to make fit together, very frequent.
In this article we will see how to manage behavioral problems in adolescents based on simple psychological principles also used in therapy and behavior modification programs. also used in therapy and behavior modification programs in general.
Tips for managing behavior problems in adolescents
Apply these educational and parenting guidelines to manage the misbehavior of a teenage son or daughter, keeping in mind that you must adapt these tips to the particular case of your family and the way of being of the young person.
1. Identify the problem
The first step is to put into words the problem to be addressedDoes he or she spend too much time playing video games? Does he or she not do homework? Does he or she respond poorly when you ask him or her for things? Leaving open the question of what is wrong usually leads to many mistakes, so it is important to go through this stage of analyzing the situation, which, on the other hand, does not usually take too long.
2. Detect aspects of his life in which he needs you.
Observe carefully what the teenager's priorities are. Don't take anything for granted when considering what their tastes and interests are (a common assumption of parents who have poor communication with their children is to assume that their children are interested in what most young people of that age are interested in).
Once you've done that, stop and think about what aspects of their life they need you most. That way, you'll know where to start when it comes to negotiating future behavioral standards.
3. Enforce behavioral rules
It is important that the adolescent feels that there is a before and after the application of this set of rules, given that those that existed previously have not been enforced. This provides legitimacy to the new system of behavioral rules.
In addition, the implications of complying with the new set of rules of behavior must be explained, the implications of compliance and non-compliance must be explained.And what will we start to offer him less in case of non-compliance with the rules?
4. Do not threaten with punishment
In general, it is inadvisable to go down the route of punishment; adolescents see in this a confirmation that they should not strive to satisfy their parents, who are usually seen as people too different from them to aspire to meet their expectations.
A punishment often alienates the young person who undergoes it, by increasing his or her hostility towards the person who has imposed the punitive measure.. When they are used, it should only be in the face of very harmful behavior, and always with an explanation that clearly shows the reason for the situation.
5. Show your satisfaction with their progress
Congratulate him or her when he or she makes progress, that what he or she does has an immediate impact on your attitude towards him or her and also increases his or her self-esteem. It is useless to hide the fact that we are happy with what he/she achieves, in any case we are taking away incentives to continue.
6. Apply all of the above consistently
Avoid as much as possible contradicting yourself, making the rules of behavior vary radically, and in general showing arbitrariness in your way of establishing rules to be followed. in the way you set rules to follow. If you do, you will be showing that none of these measures are effective or meaningful enough, and therefore no one should take them seriously.
Are you looking for professional help for your teenager?
If you live in the North of Madrid and you are the parent of an adolescent who has adopted problematic behavior patterns, we invite you to contact our team of psychotherapy professionals at the following center Psicólogos Majadahonda, which has offices in Majadahonda and Villanueva de la Cañada..
Going through a process of psychotherapy helps young children to better manage their problems, and counseling by our team of psychologists allows families to adapt well to new parenting strategies to facilitate this behavioral change.
If you are interested in learning more about what we offer, you can find more information about Psicólogos-Majadahonda by clicking here.
- Danzer, G. (2014). Multidimensional Family Therapy in Theory and Practice. Child and Youth Services 35(1), pp. 16 - 34.
- Dorn L.D.; Biro F. M. (2011). Puberty and Its Measurement: A Decade in Review. Journal of Research on Adolescence. 21(1): pp. 180 - 195.
- Larson, R., & Wilson, S. (2004). Adolescence across place and time: Globalization and the changing pathways to adulthood. In R. Lerner and L. Steinberg Handbook of adolescent psychology. New York: Wiley.
- Ramírez, M.A. (2005). Padres y desarrollo de los hijos: prácticas de crianza. Valdivia: Estudios pedagógicos.